Finit

My heart is very heavy today. Yesterday I taught my final three yoga classes, and today I trained a client at the Y for the last time and taught my last class at Twin Lakes. I've managed not to let my guard completely down and begin weeping, but it will come later.

As much as I'm ready to go ahead and start our new lives together in Mt. Airy, it is so painful to leave friends and students behind. As we all know, no matter the promises to keep in touch and visit, we rarely do. Facebook makes things a little easier to stay somewhat connected, but it's not the same. It's on to making new friends, finding a new church family, starting a new business.

I remember feeling exactly like this when we moved from Cary. As much as Burlington frustrates me with its conservative attitudes, I'm not nearly as itchy to get out of Burlington as I was to leave Cary. But even then, I remember grieving for quite a while over my lost classes and clients. I really didn't work hard at developing friendships there, so it was more of a professional loss than a personal loss, but as what I do is so very personal, it was kind of the same.

Along those lines, I have to say that if I start really thinking about the people I'm leaving behind, I'll fall into a snotty cry-fest. There is not a better bunch of people in the world than my yoga students, both at church and at Elon. Watching them become stronger and more confident in their practice has been a thrill for me, and I am humbled that I have been allowed to be a part of their yoga journeys. I have been blessed with a group of friends who are smart and funny and strong and have become like sisters to me. I have laughed more here in Burlington than at any other time in my adult life, hanging with my peeps. I will miss those birthday dinners! My church family is this great big wacky family of individuals who band together and support each other through thick and thin. Back when the room mothers and PTA dictators at Oren's first school refused to give me the time of day, our church welcomed me as a partner with open arms and were happy to see me and my family walk through the doors. Our church convinced me to give the infamous West Burlington crowd a chance, and for that I'll be forever grateful.

I am happy to report that Oren's new school feels in some ways like our church here, open-hearted and gracious, happy to see us. That will be a big change, and I look forward to watching Oren blossom in a smaller school. Having grown up in a town of less than 300 people, I'm looking forward to a smaller town. And we're all excited to be in a town that is so close to the mountains and lots of recreational opportunities.

We still have to find a house to buy, but starting next Tuesday we'll have a rental house for Rick to start enjoying during the week and all of us, including the monster kitties and stinky pup, to start enjoying in mid-June.

But for now, I'm wallowing a bit in my sadness. This afternoon, I'll pack up my blankets, straps, blocks, and mats, to be put away until I can begin new classes. There may be some tears, and there will be some lonely moments, but I have a strong feeling that this will end up being a fabulous change not only for me, but for our family as a whole.